Hey there! It sure has been an interesting week. I’ve been growing much wiser lately. Forced to grow and also willing. How about you?
Today I want to share this new truth that came to me. I sprinted to my computer to write it down.
I hope it will hit home for you.
Read on, if you’re curious.
It is a mistake to ONLY FOCUS your attention on what you can measure: Calories, your body ’weight’, your carbon footprint, the size of your ass, followers on social media, the dollars in your bank account, the number of shoes you own or the accolades you have received.
Sure, these all serve a purpose, I like the good life too. When performance is measured, it usually improves.
What if we didn’t place so much value on the measured items though. What if we did the opposite of what our culture likes and placed more value on things that you cannot measure… like love, passion and self esteem. (This is actually being done in over 40 countries, they call in Gross National Happiness – GNH)
I went to the doctor yesterday. The nurse weighed me. I haven’t seen that measurement since I was at the doctor last. I do not give any meaning to that number and it has no value to my life.
During the conversations I have with clients, I notice that the body weight number(and many other numbers) are often the measurement they are paying the most attention to.
The problem I see is actually not the measuring tools or the fact that they are measured, but instead the actual things we measure. As Chip Conley shares in his TED Talk, it’s not the tools that are the issue, it’s the toolbox.
When too much of our attention is on the tangible, bottom stuff on the Maslow Pyramid (safety and physiological), then we are forgetting about the biggest percentage of needs that are intangible and cannot be easily measured.
At the doctor, I was asked about my life. I was asked how I felt. The doctor wanted to know about my whole person. I told the doc my instinct about my gall bladder needing some flushing. He put his hands on the gallbladder and felt it and new to spend time working on getting it to move. That doctor spent time with me and I felt completely seen and heard. I felt empowered by my own health and body.
This has an enormous value to me, but you cannot easily measure it.
Many people argue with me on this or they say things like, “well if you did not like your weight, you would pay attention to the number on the scale”.
The biggest impact a person makes will not be measured.
For the record, I’ve met some really joyful, purposeful people who happen to be overweight and I’ve also met some depressed and mean skinny people. I’ve met healthy jerks and I’ve met unhealthy angels.
Don’t you think we are placing a little too much value on the measured results and not enough on the intangible aspects of our esteem, love and conscious choices in life?
For example, we cannot measure the impact that Prince has had on our culture. It isn’t just about the record sales. He was more than that.
That family member who has passed away, that impacted you so deeply, they are not remembered for anything you an measure, they had depth and soul.
So do you.
Again, it’s about the intangible things that we cannot measure.
We are all human and incredibly unique and interesting.
How can you measure something that you cannot touch, or see rise or fall. How can you put a number on how much love or joy or passion someone has. All humans are so unique. You just cannot use science to measure everything. Although, i bet we will try and that’s pretty awesome too.
One of my incredible clients, Dinah, said it best:
“Renee, has made some permanent changes in me that I can’t even put a price on it. Thinking about how important it is to be purposeful with my thoughts and how important it is to speak up and to have my voice. Just so many things. I don’t even think you can put a dollar value on it when you look back, how do you even ever put a dollar value on something that made you a wiser, happier, freer person? How do you? It’s like somebody comes along and let’s you out of your… Unties you from the chair you are bound to” – Dinah Carter
Focus on growing the intangible.
Remember to ALSO grow the things that you cannot measure. How will you know?
Well you will learn to trust your intuition and then you’ll just know. Trust me.
Talk soon,
Renee