I made this quick 4 minute video today, inspired by the lovely clients I get to work with. It’s on Understanding the power of paradox.
Please watch if you have intense cravings, desire more freedom, experience being lonely, tired, sadness or dark moments. (Pretty sure that all of us have these experiences by the way – you are not alone)
I hope you find this short little video helpful and some more inspiration from one of my first clients who was struggling with “eating her feelings”. See below the video for more.
When I began my coaching practice now over 9 years ago, one of my first clients was a woman in her mid to late 70’s. She was struggling with an eating disorder. You don’t need to have an eating disorder to relate to this woman because what she has to teach us is universal.
She had a fear that she would die not living a life that was on her own terms. She spent her entire life doing things expected of her and she never allowed herself to express who she was and do the things she had always wanted to do.
She needed courage to be more herself if she was to overcome her entire life pattern of “eating her feelings”. This beautiful woman had a light inside her that wanted to express. Her deepest feelings wanted to come out and she was scared. So food helped her numb that fear. Old patterns and comforting, familiar yet unhealthy habits consumed her.
I found out that she used to love making art as a child. Our motto became this: “Fight like hell every day to make art”
On our third session together, she asked me… “Renee, why are we focusing on my art instead of my disorder?”
I shared with her that so often we try to fix what is wrong with us instead of tapping into what is RIGHT with us.
I told her, “I can try to change you and make you into the athlete you will never be and you will continue to fear not living the life you have always wanted and dreamed of. Or I can help you develop the courage, and it will take some courage and staring fear in the face, to bring out what has always be inside of you… your art.
Now of course, we did some very important work around her patterns of bingeing and purging food – but I knew that those newer healthy habits would not stick if she didn’t find herself reconnected to that part of her that made her happy inside.
I shared this woman’s story today because I was thinking of her today and how much she inspired me also. I knew when she reached out, that our work together was her last effort to heal her life long eating disorder. She had spent most of her 70+ years with it and we had to do this right.
She could fight like hell to die early or fight like hell to make her art.
She taught me that the fruits of discovering your freedom will be the sweetest thing. That you can and will be free of the need to be anything other than who you are. That you can be free of being attached to food as a means to find yourself.
