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Renee Jayne

Eating your feelings and the power of paradox

in Emotional & Mental Health, Health Tips, Love Yourself, Love Yourself Naked, Relationships, You Tube Videos on 11/08/18

I made this quick 4 minute video today, inspired by the lovely clients I get to work with. It’s on Understanding the power of paradox.
​Please watch if you have intense cravings, desire more freedom, experience being lonely, tired, sadness or dark moments. (Pretty sure that all of us have these experiences by the way – you are not alone)

I hope you find this short little video helpful and some more inspiration from one of my first clients who was struggling with “eating her feelings”. See below the video for more.

When I began my coaching practice now over 9 years ago, one of my first clients was a woman in her mid to late 70’s. She was struggling with an eating disorder.  You don’t need to have an eating disorder to relate to this woman because what she has to teach us is universal.

She had a fear that she would die not living a life that was on her own terms. She spent her entire life doing things expected of her and she never allowed herself to express who she was and do the things she had always wanted to do.

She needed courage to be more herself if she was to overcome her entire life pattern of “eating her feelings”. This beautiful woman had a light inside her that wanted to express. Her deepest feelings wanted to come out and she was scared. So food helped her numb that fear. Old patterns and comforting, familiar yet unhealthy habits consumed her.

I found out that she used to love making art as a child.  Our motto became this: “Fight like hell every day to make art”

On our third session together, she asked me… “Renee, why are we focusing on my art instead of my disorder?”

I shared with her that so often we try to fix what is wrong with us instead of tapping into what is RIGHT with us.

I told her, “I can try to change you and make you into the athlete you will never be and you will continue to fear not living the life you have always wanted and dreamed of.  Or I can help you develop the courage, and it will take some courage and staring fear in the face, to bring out what has always be inside of you… your art.

Now of course, we did some very important work around her patterns of bingeing and purging food – but I knew that those newer healthy habits would not stick if she didn’t find herself reconnected to that part of her that made her happy inside.

I shared this woman’s story today because I was thinking of her today and how much she inspired me also.  I knew when she reached out, that our work together was her last effort to heal her life long eating disorder. She had spent most of her 70+ years with it and we had to do this right.

She could fight like hell to die early or fight like hell to make her art.

She taught me that the fruits of discovering your freedom will be the sweetest thing. That you can and will be free of the need to be anything other than who you are. That you can be free of being attached to food as a means to find yourself.

 

Free Resource: You can watch this three part video series on How To Overcome Emotional Eating and Food Addiction​

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renee__jayne
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✨What if we changed our relationship to consumpt ✨What if we changed our relationship to consumption?✨

For anyone who can hear this today and needs the reminder:
Even though there is an enormous amount of external chaos now in our world and systems, going inward and looking at your own personal opportunities to grow is extremely important now.
Especially now you will need more space.

Try not take take other people personally, they need space too.

When things are louder “out there” and there is so much uncertainty, it’s a cue to slow down, tune in to your internal voice and get clear on what you need right now.

Clear away all the noise so you can hear yourself.
Be in nature.
Create the quiet space you need so new habits and commitments can be developed.

It’s not that we won’t be tempted away to distraction. 
We will be, we’re human after all.

It’s not that we would ignore the external loud chatter completely or be naive to important issues that align with our values.

Instead we can be allowing the media wave to float along like a river away from you or next to you.
You don’t need to be “in it or of it”.
What if we changed our relationship to consumption?
We stopped becoming so attached to the latest sound byte... we just allow it to float along...

We focused on creating the new instead.

You are safe.
We are safe.
Stay grounded and centered in yourself in any way you can knowing that truth.
It is safe to relax into your quiet moments.

It’s time to choose to settle into your nervous system differently in the midst of the chaos.

If you need help or support, send me a DM. 

Love to all,
Renee
In order to love ourself, we must learn to LIKE ou In order to love ourself, we must learn to LIKE ourself first. We can choose to be accepting and our own best friend first. 
You don’t fall in love until you like a person first...
How are you being a friend to YOU?? 

Right now, the external chaos is going to reflect back to us how we are choosing to “like ourself” in our darkest moments and through these life experiences we are having and witnessing.

Loving ourself fully and deeply with trust and acceptance has never been more important.

In my experience, loving me is a practice every single day (sometimes every moment) and it happens when I choose to like me first.

I need to know i got a friend in me, that I will have my own back, so to speak... whether I am in bliss and joy or in pain or self sabotage. 

I realize more and more that when I’m not living my highest truth creatively, it’s more challenging to like myself. 

I believe at the end of the day, every person wants to feel that they contributed something of value and that they genuinely like themself.... ideally love themself!

Cheers to new beginnings. 

DM me a note if I can be of service on your holistic wellness and emotional mastery to Love You.
-Renee ❤️ #loveyourselfnaked
🌲 🌲 ❄️ ❄️ 🌲 🌲 ❄️ ❄️
There is a mother within every one of us that has There is a mother within every one of us that has our back. Within you is a nurturing love that you can lean into and give yourself, as well as others. No matter your gender or if you’re a parent, you have the strength of the mother that gives birth to new worlds.

Link in my bio @renee__jayne to keep following me and my videos and writing!  By joining my email list, you’ll definitely stay connected with me.
I’m not certain on my next steps with where I will keep posting on various social platforms now. I’m not going anywhere yet. I am definitely formulating a different plan. So if you want to make sure we stay connected, sign up for my website newsletter @renee__jayne 

And remember that you are #strongasamother 💥🔥💃🏼❤️🌹🗣
I see you! How are you doing right now? I’m need I see you! How are you doing right now? I’m needing more rest these days to show up in bigger ways! Hey... that rhymed! Fortunately, rest helps me write a lot and create more. It got me thinking... 
What if we did something new, that we’ve never done before, every single day?
It could be as simple as drinking more water or calling a friend or walking outside or making a video...?
One change every day will change your whole game. I will continue to keep you posted on my experience, it is working wonderfully over here so far 😉
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