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August 1 2013

Why don’t scales work for weight loss?

Last week I wrote about the woman who was feeling tired, unsexy and lethargic. She felt invisible to her husband and ashamed of herself.

And you know what she was doing?

She was weighing herself daily and gaining more weight.

Do you think it’s because she is lacking in motivation?

Do you think it’s because she doesn’t have the nutrition knowledge?

Maybe it’s just her gene’s?

Hmm. Maybe, but it’s unlikely.

I’m going to share why in a moment.

But first, here is what I’ve learned as a practitioner and life coach… there is something much deeper that holds us back when it comes to the scale.

And, this isn’t just for people who need to lose weight, this is for the health coaches who are knowledgeable on nutrition and exercise and also for folks struggling with eating disorders too.

It’s something that can be fixed quickly too and I’m going to share how, but first, I have a story of another client.

About 8 weeks ago, I had a client begin working with me and like many, she wanted to lose weight and had some drama around the number of pounds she needed to lose.

At around week 5, she was feeling great, happy and full of energy. She was so happy to share with me about the pair of jeans that fit her better. And then week 6 arrived….

She decided to weigh herself. The scale read that she gained 1 pound.

(Enter: emotional breakdown, freakout followed up with depression and binge eating)

How could this be… she was feeling so great, her clothes did fit better but she gained a pound…technically, she hadn’t lost any weight!! (she was so upset)

So after I got her calmed and reassured, I gave her an assignment to retest her body fat and muscle mass.

The results?

Her body fat decreased by 7% (awesome) and her muscle mass increased greatly (can’t remember that number), but it was awesome too.

And when she checked in with herself, she was feeling hydrated, happy and full of energy. We also determined that she sped up her metabolism.

The goal is not to lose weight at first, it’s to burn fat.

Once you turn your body into a fat burning machine (versus sugar burning), then you’ll lose the weight.

I know that many of you think that you have to track and measure your progress daily. Below, I’ll explain a better way on how to do that.

Here is what you need to do next:

1. How to get rid of your scale. Donate it, give it away, sell it or at the very least put it out in the garage, in storage or up on a shelf where you will not see it.

Because you will think about it.

Scales are addictions.

Weighing yourself is addictive because you are waiting for the outside number to determine your actions , how you show up throughout the day and specifically, your happiness.

That is the definition of a dependence.

2. Use your inner compass, a camera and a mirror every day.

Your body will tell you, what you need to know and you’ll also be able to tell the difference by looking in the mirror and at the pictures you take of yourself each day.

3. Focus your attention on what you want.

The scale literally forces chemical shifts in your brain and triggers stress.

Stress tells your body to store fat, literally.

What you want is to feel happy, healthy and full of energy. You want to feel seen and loved. Even if the scale gave you a burst of joy from a positive number, then it’s still artificial happiness that is outside of you.

If you take away one thing from this, remember…

It’s NOT outside of you.

You must focus your attention on how you want to feel right now and live into that right now.

This is exactly what I help my clients with. If you want more information about the transformational intensives I’m doing in August, email liz@reneeheigel.com for details.

Leave a quick comment below on your relationships with your scale… how’s it going?

With love,

Renee

PS. Next week, I’m going to be sharing the superpower that is the key to finally getting you unstuck in health, life and relationships. See you then. xoxo

July 26 2013

…the way to do is to be.

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I stumbled upon the perfect quote yesterday and I decided that it had to be added permanently to my newly updated website. And… that I had to share it with you.

In my opinion, it summarizes the core teaching of Love Yourself Naked.

Read it below and keep an eye to your inbox for transformational, free and helpful done-for-you resources as the site finishes up “construction”.

Okay, you gotta read this now, it’s so good… xo Renee

Always we hope

someone else has the answer.

Some other place will be better,

some other time

it will all turn out.

This is it.

No one else has the answer.

No other place will be better,

and it has already turned out.

At the center of your being you have the answer;

you know who you are and you know what you want.

There is no need

to run outside

for better seeing.

Nor to peer from a window.

Rather abide at

the center of your being;

for the more you leave it

the less you learn,

Search your heart

and see

the way to do

is to be.

-LaoTzu, Translator Unknown

June 5 2013

A really painful lesson + my tattoo

Renee 1

I want to talk about pain.

(and no, it’s not the pain of the tattoo I just got –pictured right)

I’ll get to that in a moment.

I’m talk’n about the drown your sorrows in chocolate syrup on a spoon pain (hell, maybe you pour it right on your tongue??)

How about the face that smiles so others see you are happy but inside you are crying and dying.

How about the drugged up pain… Taking so many anti-depressants, meds, smoking pot and drinking alcohol that you’re literally a walking shell. You know it, but you’re afraid there isn’t any other way.

The binging on food pain… Gorging yourself and eating and eating until you are so full and sick. Feeling guilty and shitty and then asking why you even bother… And then doing it again. It’s a vicious cycle.

How about the ‘bury yourself in work pain’ so I don’t have to think about “him” or “her”.

Or the pain of getting dressed in the morning, not fitting into those clothes stuffed in the corner that you love and then avoiding the mirror.

The pain of not getting pregnant after trying and trying.

The pain of wondering whether or not he (or she) is going to one day leave you.

The pain of not wanting to come home to your family after a long day when you know you “should” want to, but today you just don’t…

I’ve wanted to write about PAIN for weeks and I couldn’t do it. I knew the concept I needed to share with you, but the words wouldn’t flow for me.

I later realized that I had to release some pain myself…

I found some buried anger recently. A great friend helped me see it and I was reluctant… almost kicking and screaming.

Well, actually not almost, that’s not really true…

I let myself feel it fully and to be brutally honest… I beat the sh!t out of my bed… Pounded my fists into pillows over and over and over until I yelled and screamed and cried.

My nails gripped so hard into my hands, I drew blood.

(Before you think I’ve lost it – I haven’t)

Listen to this.

When you were young, you could take the pain by yourself. You didn’t need a coach or a self-help book. Your body could take it even when it was really hard and sometimes your parents would come in to help you endure it. And…

Sometimes they didn’t.

In fact, sometimes they were not there at all. So you know what happened next…?

You learned some ways to numb the pain. You didn’t realize what you were doing then, but now you have a choice and you can see a bit more clearly. The clouds have parted for you as you are reading this note from me.

I realized that I wasn’t always feeling all of my pain fully…

And I have a feeling you do the same because you fear:

You can’t handle it and you might completely lose it.
You don’t want to annoy people with your sob story and then you will be abandoned by everyone.
Showing pain is weak and everyone will turn away from you and stop respecting you.
It’s way too vulnerable for you and you don’t want to let go of control (this was big for me)
There is no point to all of this. I’d rather keep it to myself because it won’t help anyway.

Pain Lesson.

The bullets above are not true. In order to move out of these beliefs that you’ve convinced yourself of since childhood, you must be willing to test them and see what’s on the other side and prove them right or wrong.

You also must be willing to let go of the stuff that you use to numb the pain (the chocolate, sugar, alcohol, people, controlling behavior)

My lesson is this… I didn’t explode or catch fire when I felt the pain and anger.

Now I did hurt my mattress a bit.

I also had a couple of friends and my dad support me by listening to me and most importantly, I was willing to open up to them.

Note. The anger I had wasn’t about a life altering thing, but keeping it inside is life altering.

I realized a pattern of playing the role of strong woman, mom, entrepreneur who is so positive and she will just look on the bright side and take care of it.

Well guess what… sometimes we need to get freak’n angry, cry and punch stuff. That makes us human and anger is unbelievably healthy!

I feel incredible now. By the way, I’m ready for more whenever it comes in the future too… Because it will and I want to feel it all.

Yes, There will be pain. No going over it or around it or under. You must go through it.

How you go through that pain is your choice.

What you are going to realize is that you didn’t die from feeling it… you will see that you’ll actually feel better and gain the most important strength from it.

I feel strong enough to scale a mountain right now (not kidding).

Big share.

So I just created the structure to take Love Yourself Naked programs to the masses. There are new life changing tools and programs coming your way.

I’m sick of seeing most people walk around in pain and pretending to be happy.

Happy… Truly happy is real and accessible to everyone. Happy isn’t determined by your external circumstances.

It is a choice. I know, easier said than done because you may be ignoring the fine qualities of your character that make you incredible.

And…

Since now you won’t be burying pain any longer, I want you to know…

In the weeks ahead, I’m going to answer this phenomenon on how to be truly happy in your body and life.

I’m totally committed to this idea of health and happy and presence… of LOVE YOURSELF NAKED. I believe they are all connected to you being able to live in the moments of your life…

I’m so committed I tattooed this vision and my purpose on my left wrist. (I could write a whole blog about the tattoo meaning… I’ll save that for a future date)

In the meantime, I want to share a video from a man I deeply respect and can relate to fully (it wasn’t always that way… I used to fear him and think he was a bit odd)

Now, I want to have tea with him and contemplate life’s questions.

(I know, I’m a bit of a nerd)

He’s Eckhart Tolle.

I love his humor in this quick 4 minute clip and Eckhart gives a very nice description of the meaning of my tattoo.

Eckhart Tolle: Consciousness Is Now

See you next week and please comment below. I want to know about your pain. Outing it helps take it away, so share.

Renee xo

PS. There is an early bird list for a program starting in July that I am chomping at the bit to share. I want to climb a mountain right now and share it with the world… My team is making me wait a week though.

I’ll make you a video about it all for you to view next week. Stay tuned.

May 31 2013

this epidemic is zapping your mojo + the recipes to fix it

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My life is forever changed.

(No, it’s not the little tattoo I got last week… but I’m excited to share that story with you on next weeks blog)

I learned that my headaches, nervous system, digestion and sleep improved from this. My body was happier, I was happier and I had more energy!

Here is the raw deal. You are probably deficient in a very important mineral.

That mineral is magnesium.

It is an epidemic in most of the America’s and it is affecting a whole list of stuff in your body as your read this.

When clients come to me, I see that they are often struggling with insomnia, depression, eating disorders or eating too much. Can you relate to this?

Digestive problems are common, yes?

Lack of energy is a complaint from most.

There is often depression, hormonal issues and addiction to caffeine and sugar in our lives.

Magnesium can make a profound difference with all of this (and maybe hundreds of others).

I highly recommend drinking a magnesium supplement (my personal favorite is below)

This could really change your life.

One simple thing can shift everything.

Did you know that by eating refined grains and carbs they actually remove over 75% of the magnesium from your body.

I like to make nut milk regularly from things like Brazil Nuts, Cashews, Almonds, Hemp Seeds and Hazelnuts.

Now you can buy these milks at the store, but you are only getting a tiny amount of the minerals you really need. That stuff is so highly processed.

It is cheaper and really, really easy to make your own. You only need a blender, cheese cloth and nuts or seeds.

It’s important that you know that taking a magnesium pill every day is not going to do it for you. You will need magnesium from a variety of sources so I’ve giving you a bunch to start with.

My favorite magnesium supplement (purchase and drink before bed):

8 oz bottle or 30 packets
Here is a video I made for you on how to make Almond milk (you can substitute any seed or nut with this recipe) —->> how to make almond milk
Here is my hemp seed milk recipe —->> hemp milk recipe
Here is a list of magnesium rich foods:
Cocoa powder (yes chocolate… avoid it if it’s high in sugar)
Spinach
Nuts and seeds (brazil nuts, cashews, almonds, flax seeds, sunflower seeds, sesame seeds, pine nuts)
Use nut butters from the above choices
Squash or pumpkin seeds
Dried Coriander (use for cooking)
Brown Rice or Oatmeal
Molasses
Dark leafy greens (swiss chard and kale)
Coffee

There is a link between cancer patients and low magnesium levels, by the way.

Take action on this.

Okay. I challenge you to make this shift in your diet and make some comments below on what you are committed to doing. I love hearing from you!

You have the ability to make profound change by doing one simple thing.

Let’s start with this right now.

Huge bear hugs to you today.

Renee

PS. On next weeks blog I have a very important announcement and secret to share with you. Stay tuned and don’t forget to get this supplement (I’m not affiliated with them by the way, I just love what it did for my body).

Magnesium Notes.

If you start getting loose stools it is sign you may have too much magnesium so you simply cut the amount you take in half.

Your body may not feel the difference right away because you may need a few days to build up the supply. Be patient and keep taking it daily via foods and the supplements I recommended.

March 29 2013

Why you are not sleeping

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You may be coveting sleep like it is the last drop of water on earth and yet there are times you cannot get yourself to get any.

You’re enticed by the quick fix, the glass of wine, the little pill or the nature sound music.

You’ve tried the lavender on your pillow, the new mattress, the change in schedule and diet.

You’ve stopped the late night caffeine. Nothing is working.

You are beginning to feel like you are losing your mind.

It’s crucial you get this sleep. You cannot stand living like this anymore.

You are feeling a little hopeless because this has happened so many times before.

You’ll read the book; you’ll do some breathing or write.

Your brain is wired.

You feel so drained and yet completely out of control.

Still nothing is working.

You glance at the clock again. 4 am.

I might as well just lay here for an hour longer and then get up…

Now…

You’ve adjusted yourself to a “normal” life with less sleep while you tell silly stories about how you only need 4 or 6 hours when you know intuitively you really need more.

Bedtime stories à trois.

I sit in a Starbucks as I type this and I observe without judgment. I like to do these observations of human behavior from time to time… in pharmacies, grocery stores, restaurants and coffee shops mostly. What are we drinking, eating, consuming? How are we behaving and how does it have an impact on our human behavior and health.

Un.

There is a man sitting with his girlfriend and he’s reading the newspaper and he is back and forth to his phone. Paper, phone, paper, phone. He’s drinking out of a green straw that is dipped deeply into a sugary coffee drink covered in whip cream… His drinks are tempting and he wants more. He hasn’t removed his lips from the straw… he drinks this warm beverage like it’s his lifeblood. His eyes haven’t left his paper or phone. The girl… she is looking around the room. At the fireplace, the books, her coffee and people. She looks so incredible sad. Her posture is rounded and she is sunken into the chair. Her eyes look down so deeply that I wish I could get up and hug her right now and tell her how beautiful she is inside. She wants to be seen and loved by him…. He doesn’t notice her.

Deux.

I’m in a restaurant with my grandparents and son, we are eating breakfast. There is a man, a wife and their son. The boy is around 10 years old. The man is eating pancakes, the son is eating waffles and the wife is drinking only a cup of coffee. She is sitting quietly by herself moments from tears as her husband and son spend the entire breakfast on their phones. There is no conversation taking place between any of them. She is embarrassed. She is visibly depressed by her reality. She says nothing and continues to sip her coffee. I could feel her sadness from where I was sitting and the tightness in her throat.

Trois.

Years ago, as my driven nature sprung forth to grow my passion, my business, I began staying up later and later at night. I was a brand new mom and reflecting back I was also looking for an outlet to remind me that I was still a feminine woman. New moms will understand that statement and I was used to being up at night… often nursing my son anyway. My former marriage was hard at the time and I innocently poured myself into work. All of the addictions to work I had in the past came rushing back and it wasn’t until later in one moment that I became aware of what I was doing. I then knowingly allowed them to consume me once again.

I stayed up later and later. I was writing and creating some amazing stuff so it was easy to justify and yet slowing killing my adrenals and my tender body. I undoubtedly wasn’t fostering intimacy in my marriage. I wasn’t as present of a mother for my son. I was sacrificing myself and choosing my computer instead. It wasn’t until later that I realized that the “addiction” to staying up and working late was self-punishment.

I was angry with myself and this was my way of hurting me. I had shifted from creative genius to angry zombie in a few short months and yet I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t sleep. I began pulling all nighters… I went down the rabbit hole of a sleepless-depression.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

There are triggers that cause our sleep problems. Stress, computer or phone usage, travel, work or relationship issues. Trauma within our life or bodies or potential hormonal shifts. Emotional causes as well as food, drugs or alcohol make impacts too.

Sleep is essential for a person’s health and wellbeing and yet there are millions of people who do not get enough. As a practitioner, it is one of the most common complaints I get from people when I begin working with them. Interestingly enough, it isn’t just adults experiencing sleep problems, it’s also our children.

Today, I want to offer you a NATURAL SLEEP perspective.

Sleep is natural to life. Your body already knows how to heal, you were born to sleep and you will do it again.

If our inner sleep rhythm is off then there is always a natural solution to it. I’m talk’n Circadium Rhythms, laws of nature and daylight.

I’m speaking now to your biology as a human being.

The release of melatonin from your pineal glad makes you feel sleepy. As the morning light comes up, on a cellular level we feel it and then drip, drip, drip… more melatonin and we wake up.

Sleep is a signal that says, hey body… time to regulate your cortisol, thyroid and estrogen.

Without sleep you are throwing your hormones completely off balance.

Causing hundreds of difficulties with your health and body.

Intuitively you know this.

Also, it’s the reason why you’ll do almost anything possible to get it, right?

AND YET…

We have late nights, tablet, computer and phone use that is non-stop. We have caffeine, alcohol, anxiety, eating late at night and stress holding us back.

We look for the quick fix versus the root of the issue. The quick fix will provide exactly that and will create major issues long term.

A very recent study at the time of this post shows that sleeping pills don’t work well. There is 50% placebo affect. They are also shown to increase mortality and are linked to cancer.

OWN YOUR SLEEP!

Get more answers that are personal to your body and Dosha. Schedule a session with Renee here.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

There is nothing more important than your sleep and there is no better time for you to change your life to focus on your sleep. Your life really does depend on it.

Dirty Little Sleep secrets.

Bye, bye.

Remove your computer, tablets and phone from your bedroom completely. The body’s circadian rhythm tells us to get ready for sleep as the sun goes down. That light from your tech gadgets confuses your body and melatonin and keeps you awake. Staring at a screen before going to bed kills your sleep and your sex life too.

Your bedroom.

This needs to be a sanctuary. Sex and sleep only. Remove all technology from it. Clean and organize clothing, closets, and under the bed. Create a space that invites the two functions of the bedroom. Make it dark. Keep the room cold… Yes, below 67 degrees. Practice sex and sleep. Both masturbation and sex increase endorphins (similar to a good workout) that this will make you sleepy.

Your food.

Reduce or eliminate caffeine. Drinking warm almond milk with nutmeg is soothing. Eliminate alcohol. This actual makes it harder to sleep… drinking wine is a myth. Enjoy chamomile tea and foods that have magnesium and vitamin B. Dark green leafy veggies regularly throughout the day. Legumes, nuts and seeds.

Your routine.

Work out and get exercise daily. Get outside as much as possible for natural light to increase your melatonin throughout the day. Ideally, you want to be in bed before 10pm. Journal out your stresses, to do’s, work or relationship struggles and leave them before you get into bed. Meditate and breathe before bed if necessary. Take a warm bath.

Your awareness practice.

Meditate, each morning and between 5-7pm (as the sun goes down) preparing your body for sleep.

Your breathe.

I just spent the weekend with Andrew Weil and Deepak Chopra and a few hundred practitioners learning about the power of healing. Breathing can change your life… when you do it properly. Most of us don’t. Here is a specific breathing technique that can change your life, it changed mine: Andrew Weil 4-7-8 Breathing.

Your mentality.

I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty damn determined to find a way to live life to my fullest potential each day. For both me and you, as a practitioner and entrepreneur it is absolutely necessary that I live the practices I share with you. The most successful entrepreneurs that I know, meditate, sleep well, eat amazing, have great sex, thriving friendships, good relationships and a great community. They read and grow their soul through personal development. So… You find a way. That is the mentality. You find a way to not sacrifice YOU for other things.

Your toxicity.

You may need a little internal and external cleansing. Toxic build up within the body creates disease, stress and sickness. The more toxic you are, the harder it will be to sleep. Your emotions and past issues from childhood are held deep within your cells. This creates stress. We watched our parents struggle with sleep and so we may do the same. Poor sleep is NOT genetic. It isn’t a life sentence; it is a learned.

Your environment.

Dim lights around the house and light candles. Burn incense or use essential oils that help with sleep. Turn off television, computers and gadgets within an hour before you sleep. Play relaxing music or nature sounds.

Your supplements.

Magnesium and B complex vitamins are essential. I always recommend eating foods that contain these as a first option. Valerian root is helpful and there are others that I would recommend to a private client after knowing their body and history.

From my heart to yours,

xo

Renee PS. If you are interested in scheduling a private session with me for sleep, life or health, please email Liz at support@reneeheigel.com for details.

March 12 2013

Dirty food vs. clean food + free gifts

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What’s Wrong With My Body?

Some of the most common nutritional issues that I hear from clients in my sessions revolve around these phrases:

– I think I have food sensitivities
– I have no energy
– I need a plan
– I want more confidence in my body
– I don’t want to feel restricted
– I put everybody else first
– I feel out of control
– I don’t sleep

Simple Solutions

My wise friend, Dr. Brie Gindele, shared on my Facebook Page recently, that if you added one healthy choice of organic or whole foods to your diet each month for the rest of the year, by the time the year is complete, you would have added in 12 new different organic veggies into your diet.

Time and money are excuses that come up for many of us.
– Can I afford this?
– Will I have time?

It’s your health. You can make time now, or you can make time 10 years from now, either way you’ll need to do it.

When you eat clean (naked foods), then you are literally improving your health: you are missing less work, and more importantly, you’re spending less on prescriptions, doctors bills, cold medicine, and junk food.

Spend More to Save More?

I know that spending a few dollars more on clean foods will save you money, time, and happiness in the long run – or even as short as a week! But I can’t convince you – you really need to eat a whole foods diet without sugar, caffeine, gluten, alcohol, or processed foods for at least a week. There is no way you’ll know how amazing you can feel until you’ve lived without it for a period of time.

You keep working out because you feel the burn, sore muscles, and then eventually results, right? You will feel the discomfort for a few days when you give some things up, but then you’ll feel the way I did, and the way many of my clients have when they clean out their diet: a sense of clarity and wholeness.

A Visualization Exercise

You feel the energy you crave. You have a plan. Your confidence soars and you begin to trust yourself. You learn to put yourself first and you can understand your sensitivities. You begin to experience better sleep because your body is made to do this naturally.

It takes completely eliminating something in order to experience this.

The 18-Day Love Yourself Naked® Challenge is a catalyst and life changer for many men and women right now. If you’ve been on the fence, we close the doors for our spring cleanse in just 2 weeks. Details are here.

New Friends, New Experiences, New Lessons

As you read this, I’m flying out to an intimate retreat with Deepak Chopra, Andrew Weil, and many others. I look forward to sharing this experience with you on a later blog.

Speaking of flying, I met a man on a flight to the Caribbean in 2003 that I will never forget. His story impacted me immensely. At that point in my life, the conversation changed me, along with the view I had about the world. We started talking because I was reading a book about our food system at the time, and he happened to notice it. This interesting man is a farmer from the Midwest Corn Belt.

He spends his day-to-day life carrying on the legacy of the men (and women) before him, working the family farm. He told me that he got caught up in the industrial revolution and the idea that we needed to use chemicals to improve our production and quality of crops.

After years of spraying pesticides and using chemicals around the farm, this man’s body started to break down. He started feeling numb in certain areas of his body, and strange tumors began growing. He told me that he got crippling migraines and at times, he couldn’t even tend his farm.

He shared with me that never once at the beginning did it dawn on him that there could be a connection between the chemicals on the farm and his condition.

The Breakdown Before the Breakthrough

After months of seeing doctors, taking medications and drugs, and seeing no results, he decided to cleanse his body. He told me that he spent days in his home alone because the smell and condition of his body was so bad… His body was releasing the chemicals. It got worse before it got better because those toxins needed to come out. The smell his body was giving off was like nothing he had ever smelled in his life… it was so bad that he drove over an hour away to another grocery store so that the neighbors wouldn’t have to smell him, and no one would recognize him.

He said the tumors got worse before they got better. The tumors spread all over his body. As he detoxed and added in clean foods, eventually his health began turning around, and he healed his body.

The rest of our conversation was about the sale of his farm and the purchase of a new “organic” farm that has grown to be quite well known in the Midwest. What an inspiration and a familiar story for many other organic pioneers in today’s agricultural world.

What We Have Learned

This story really lit a spark under me a decade ago. I’m forever grateful for meeting that inspiring man. He is a pioneer for the Local Food and Organic Movement.

If you were to ask the FDA (Food and Drug Administration), they would tell you that all fruits and vegetables are safe for consumption and that the levels of pesticides are below the risk level.

Certainly, we have many more studies to do in the years ahead to determine exactly what the harmful effects of pesticides in our food and water supply have on our bodies.

Yes, most of us are not like my farmer friend – we are not directly spraying chemicals and breathing them in. Instead, we are just eating them and letting them absorb into our tissues, cells, and bones while being carried through our blood streams.

Most recently, there have been connections with pesticides and cancer, Attention Deficit Disorder, obesity and nervous system and auto-immune disorders

Moreover, it’s not just the sprayed pesticides, but it’s also the entire idea of factory farming, eating genetically modified and intensely processed foods, that should be a concern to you.

What You Can Learn

Today, we’ve put together 2 lists:

The first contains the top foods to buy organic every time, and the foods that you could get away with passing on the organic version so you can stay within your budget.

The second list is called the dirty dozen. It lists out a dozen things to look for within packaged and processed foods – things you do not want to be eating.

To download the PDFs, right click and save:
1. When To Buy Organic
2. The Dirty Dozen

Many of you know this stuff, but some of you are learning it for the first time.

How can you improve if you know this info?
Where are you slacking when it comes to your health right now?
If this is a new concept, can you incorporate 1-2 new items this month and work up to 12 new organic items in your diet by the end of the year?

Let me know in the comments!

xoxo

P.S. Reminder: we have about 2 weeks left before the 18-Day Love Yourself Naked® Challenge closes. Click below to kick start your clean eating routine.
==> 18-Day Love Yourself Naked® Challenge

P.P.S. Don’t forget to save your free documents:
1. When To Buy Organic
2. The Dirty Dozen

March 5 2013

Sisterhood, Brotherhood, and Your Health {A blog from MY sister}

Renee 0

There is really not much that I can think of that can hold your head above water like your sisterhood (or brotherhood) does when life throws you punches, scrapes, and heart break. There is also no other community that can stretch you to be your best self, either.

When I’m really honest with myself, I admit that I used to take “sisterhood” for granted. I often had a proud attitude, thinking, “I can do it myself and I don’t need anyone to help me.”

The past 2 years have taught me profound lessons about the power of sisterhood, and I am so deeply in awe of the women that I have in my sisterhood. I never imagined it could be like this, and I know that this is just the beginning. Sisterhood includes your tribe. In my tribe, one of those sisters happens to be blood and she also happens to be one of my heroes.

Today, I’ve given the blog over to her. She is not only my sister but also my friend, client, and teacher. Her name is Sara, and she is a new mom to Emma, pictured below with myself and my son, Manny. Sara has been an incredible kindergarten teacher for 13 years.

She also lost over 30 lbs prior to her baby, and then lost all of her baby weight, too. She took part in the 18-Day Love Yourself Naked® Challenge years ago. This is her story.

xo Renee

Crossroads… we come to them so frequently in life, and there are so many factors affecting which path we will choose to take. I was at a crossroads with my own body and also with my career. A wise colleague sat me down and changed my direction. She told me that (career-wise) I was part of a TEAM. I didn’t have to solve all of my professional challenges on my own; I had back-up; I had support. She said that by asking for the help and the input of others, I would actually be a better professional. When I related those words to my own body and health goals, it made sense.

I had sought help to fulfill my professional goals. Now it was my time to seek assistance for my health goals. When it came to my negative body image and general lack of good health, who would I ask for help???? In my own words: I felt humiliated to admit that I had lost control of my body.

To allow another person to help me fix something that I had abused (to help fix ME) seemed unreasonable.

Who could I go to and trust with my most precious possession? Who could I allow myself to be so vulnerable around? Who would be on my team?

I’m not sure when it came to me, but the one person who by no means seemed likely on my list of possible teammates was the one who would help me. My YOUNGER sister would be the one to help me be healthy. The sister who I had always viewed as TINY, THIN, SKINNY, and effortlessly BEAUTIFUL, who didn’t need to lose weight, would be my teammate. Most importantly, she was the one person who I NEVER would have imagined listening to years before. My little sister (literally) was an individual who had been slender her whole life; and did so by eating chips, drinking cola, and smoking. What did she know, right???

For my whole life, I only ever wanted to be thin; I didn’t care how I got there.

I was mad that I couldn’t eat chips and just be slender like my sister (the cigarettes and pop never interested me). I loved veggies, I ate “healthy” (so I thought), drank gallons of water, and did every cabbage soup/grapefruit/tuna-fish/herbal diet there was, to lose weight. I was angry! I even enrolled in a boot camp to punish my body/mind into losing the fat. I did lose weight. Then I gained it right back. How could a person who has never been 20+ pounds overweight help me?

My sister, too, had come to a crossroads. Though younger, she had come to her crossroads first and had been learning a lot along the way. She could show me the right path because she had also needed to make changes to improve her health. My sister could be on my team because she was a woman who had much to share. Yes, she might have always been thin… but had she learned, more importantly, how to be HEALTHY in her body.

So, after 30+ birthday wishes gone bad, I made a promise to myself.

I had wasted far too many years “wishing” to be something I was not. I would pray for strength, I would ask for help. I did not have to be alone in my journey of being healthy. When I finally put my pride aside, I not only asked for her help, but I also truly listened to her speak her truth. I found that she knew a great deal, actually! She WAS thin… but in her past she was definitely not healthy.

My sister and I had a lot more in common than simply being related.

Our conversations helped transform my way of thinking about what I wanted for myself and my body. I needed to slow down, reevaluate, and really take care of ME. I realized that it was my mind that had to transform. I needed to think about positive life/health changes instead of just “weight loss” in order for me to make progress. Being slim was NOT more important than being healthy.

On this journey of becoming healthy (which I now know to be a lifelong journey), I came to understand that in the past, I was not really listening to my body. I listened, and I stopped thinking about fast, quick, easy, immediate/drastic results and basically stopped thinking in terms of “weight loss.” Taking the fastest path would never get me to the ultimate destination: a HAPPY, HEALTHY ME. I started thinking about good health and feeling physically and mentally healthy. I also gathered that asking for help actually felt “safe.”

Once my thought processes began to change, I noticed that my body began to transform.

It’s astounding what we can learn from our sisters (biological, adopted, friends). We always have something to learn or to gain by simply taking the time to hear their truth.

PRESENT DAY: Now that I have a daughter, I realize, even more, the importance of slowing down to balance taking care of myself and my baby girl. I honestly believe that the path I was on previously had led me to two, heartbreaking miscarriages. This new path, with the help of my sister, led me to the greatest blessing I could ever have… my daughter.

It isn’t all about me anymore. I have a greater goal. I will choose to be healthy because the gift of her life was entrusted to me, and I am charged with teaching her all I have learned in life, so far. Since my actions will speak volumes to her, I am even more driven to be a good example.

Becoming a mom changed me and forced me to look at myself in a completely different way. I was blessed with the opportunity to experience pregnancy, labor, and childbirth. Motherhood has given me the gift of learning not only what amazing feats my body can accomplish, but has also given me an important opportunity to listen deeply to my body, respect its limitations, and treat it with love. I am also reminded to ask continually for help when needed, because I am surrounded by many “sisters.”

A FINAL NOTE: MY SISTER
She is truly the best gift my parents could ever have given me, though I surely didn’t realize it or believe it at a young age! I have learned to appreciate truly what it means to have a sister, and I’d be lost without her. It most certainly wasn’t evident to me all at once… it was more like constant reminders throughout my life that finally linked in my brain and heart.

I suppose it is the knowledge that I have someone who will always be connected to me, unlike any other relationship I’ll ever have. Sisters share memories and thoughts that no one else can possibly understand. (Click to tweet!) I have come to treasure them.

What’s even more amazing is that now that we are grown and both have our own children, I feel I can relate to her on an even deeper level. We both share something more: that we are part of the universal sisterhood of those who have experienced the miracle of birth, or having a child of their own. We now can also share our “sisterhood” and a special bond with my daughter.

It’s remarkable that the bond of motherhood transcends blood relations to connect all women on earth into this sisterhood. The very moment I carried my beautiful baby in public I was made aware of this fact. Maya Angelou wrote, “Sister, open your heart, fling your hopes high, and set your dreams aloft. I am here to hold your hand.” (Click to tweet!) I consider myself fortunate to have not only my true sister to hold my hand, but many others (who I call “friend”) in this life.

Sara
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P.S. I’ve spent years creating the very program that was Sara’s catalyst for her lifelong journey to health and happiness. The 18-Day Love Yourself Naked® Challenge is more than a cleanse – it’s a sisterhood and a brotherhood. Your health and happiness don’t need to wait. Learn more here.

Tell me in the comments: what are your closest sister and brotherhoods? What’s one of the most important things that you’ve learned from them?

Your homework: thank a brother or sister today, biological or symbolic, and give them some appreciation. We all know they deserve it.

February 28 2013

Say no and set boundaries {with love}

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So you have a hard time saying “no” huh?

You did a few things this week because you felt guilty and now you’re angry with yourself.

You complain that you get taken advantage of and people walk all over you…?

You find yourself, saying, “How can I not take that comment personally?”

Boundaries.

There was a pivotal moment for me where I began to see the emotional connection to my desires, specifically for food.

I was renting an office space on the top floor of this massive office complex for the marketing biz I was running at the time. There was a little restaurant, downstairs on the first floor. I often bought my lunch there and ate way too many spinach pies.

One morning when arriving to the office, I parked and just sat in my car. I couldn’t bring myself to go in. I was feeling sad, unmotivated and stressed. I didn’t feel like I had any time for me and that people around me always wanted more, more, more. All of the thoughts in my head were shifted to “what was going wrong in my life”.

When I gained some composure, I went inside and started the day with some interviews to add some people to the team I had. When I finished and came out of one of the offices, I learned that someone had come in and stolen my laptop.

I felt like I got kicked while I was down.

I immediately went downstairs and bought candy, chips, cookies, and anything else I could find.

I slowly walked back up the flights of stairs with my items and sat down at my desk and began to eat, and it was in that moment that I learned what I was really doing with this “food”. I noticed a pattern. As I dove deeper into my salt and vinegar chips, I began to feel disgusted.

I made a spontaneous choice and threw away everything.

When I think back to that time in my life, especially as a woman, I felt driven, burned out, controlling and uber-ambitious and determined. I didn’t say no, even when I wanted to. I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. I was also frustrated because I wasn’t getting the results I wanted despite my hard work.

I know now that at the time, I had a very masculine energy.

Yin/Yang.

Yang/Masculine — outward, focused, driven, productive

Yin/Feminine — inward, open, receiving, creative

We are all created to have a little of both feminine and masculine energy regardless of our gender.

For me, my masculine energy was shining a little too bright.

I needed so badly to feel safe. I grew up not trusting anyone.

When I was focused, driven, productive, and exerting my energy outward, I felt safe.

I traded my femininity in for safety.

There are millions of women who are doing this around the world right now.

To feel this sense of safety, we often dive head-first into our masculine selves. I’ve given it a name today for you, but I’m convinced the majority of you reading this blog didn’t realize your actions were “masculine”.

Ladies, this doesn’t make you a man.

A masculine man is born to lead, solve, guide, and direct. It’s instinctual.

A women who is feminine also nurtures more. She is internal, giving, and free (she tends to live more with her heart versus her head). She is vulnerable and open to love.

(reminder that both men and women possess all of these traits at different times)

A woman can be feminine AND also be strong, confident, and hold her own.

A man can be masculine AND vulnerable and open.

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In order to compensate for this masculine part of myself that was shining a little too bright, I buried myself in work and food. I shopped. I smoked. I ate lots of chocolate to try to balance it all out.

At the time, I didn’t know this whole masculine-feminine stuff. I just knew that this pattern of eating crap when I felt l like crap wasn’t working anymore.

Everything is energy, and when we are not prioritizing our energy, then that energy needs to go somewhere.

We end up internalizing it, and then it comes out in various ways: food, sugar, alcohol, relationships, shopping, work, drugs, and caffeine – you get the picture.

You relate to this, right?

You might already know that the extra weight you carry is symbolic of the safety you desire.

The amount you might immerse yourself in the tub of ice cream, relationships that are unhealthy or dependent, or your workaholic ways are often a reflection of seeking safety in something outside of you.

Your body reflects your ego.

Are you ready to let go of this?

Yes?

Toxic.

I was sitting in court this week fighting a traffic ticket (yes, I walked away with no points) and I overheard this woman next to me sharing with someone that she spent $2,500 on this curio cabinet to hold the 100+ ‘Precious Moment’ knick-knacks given to her that she absolutely loathes.

She said, “I hate those damn things, I spent thousands on something just to store crap in my home that I don’t even like. I felt like I had to…”

Sound familiar?

Self-sacrifice leads to resentment, guilt, anger, obligation and more emotions. These are the biggest internal factors that destroy our health.

These are called internal toxins.

So many of us are in this cycle of over-achieving, controlling, and doing, and then building up a toxic overload because of it, and then going home to numb it all out with a glass of red wine and bowl of popcorn.

That’s not going to work for you and it didn’t work for me.

When in this self-sacrificing place, not only will you attract unhealthy relationships with needy, dependent people, but you will also continue the cycle and halt your capacity to learn from your experiences.

There is hope, please don’t fear.

It’s time to build up some more boundaries, internally.

You must figure out how much the situation is about you versus the other person, and then specifically learn to stand up for yourself.

I hear this often from my clients and readers…

I don’t want to make any waves.

I don’t like confrontation.

It isn’t my personality to say how I feel.

You were likely not taught how to create boundaries as a child if this sounds like you.

You are likely used to feeling guilt and dishing it out on occasion, and you must face the guilt directly.

How, you ask?

You must make yourself a priority.

“Good self-care is the single, most important aspect of our health, period.”

~ Dr. Christiane Northrop

Self-care includes not using food, work, substances, shopping, etc. to numb you. Please learn where you are channeling this extra masculine-feminine energy and channel it into self-love instead.

Self-care includes exploring practices of spirituality or awareness that allow you to feel safe without external stuff.

Self-care means learning the power of saying “no” and telling people your priorities are different right now. Saying “no” to someone else is really saying “yes” to yourself. This takes practice. Start now.

Self-care means seeking support from people who will help you put yourself on your priority list versus people who are enabling you because they have the same “boundary” stuff going on.

Take action.

Most of our energy is often spent hiding our true self.

Know that it may be time for you to establish stronger boundaries in your life that support you and allow you to evolve as a human being.

You must determine how much is about you and how much of it is about the other person.

Ask for help.

Learn to stand up for yourself. Practice, practice. A mirror works great at first.

Self care and creating boundaries is your responsibility.

It doesn’t matter what you learned as a child. Your adult self will flourish with boundaries and self-care.

These internal toxins are destroying your health and I have a strong belief that you can heal them by letting them go.

Delight in yourself today by saying no to someone else.

I want to remind you of something:

Yes, you’ll feel guilty at first.

Yes, it will feel uncomfortable.

But here is the truth…

You will not be able to give the gifts that you are meant to give in this lifetime while you are feeling guilty, without any internal boundaries.

When you numb the guilt you are also numbing the joy.

I am here with you holding your hand along the way.

It’s time to step into your naked truth.

This is pivotal path in that journey.

Deep gratitude and love,

Renee

PS. We have men and women who rock and are experiencing the 18 Day Love Yourself Naked® Challenge right now. They are inspiring me deeply. Sound like something you want in your life?

Details are here.

February 7 2013

3 C’s to sustaining weight loss + 10 action steps

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You have this story of your weight gain and loss. The story of your life. I bet you’ve told it often. Maybe not to many others, but it plays like a broken record in your own head.

This story is all of yours, it belongs to you. It’s been molded by your culture, your parents, your childhood and that hurtful comment from your peer on the school bus. You’ve taken it with you and it’s weight is worth decades of baggage.

It weighs you down.

Because this story is yours… all of yours. You can change it. You have that ability. Only you.

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Who is this girl, Renee, who looks to be skinny teaching me about weight loss, you ask?

I’ve lost 15-20 pounds but I’ve helped lots of people lose from 5-70+ pounds.

What you need to know about me is that I’m blunt, I’m a bit edgy and smart. I know my craft. I will tell you like it is with deep love and compassion.

Why is this important?

Because I promise to say stuff to you that you haven’t heard before or that get’s deeply under your skin and makes you think about something differently?

I like to do this because I’ve been in your shoes…

And, I know that sometimes that is what it takes to grow and change.

If you don’t like what I have to say, you can either stop reading or you can take a good look at why what I am saying bother’s you so much.

Is there truth that you might not want to see?

No, we don’t have the same story or struggles. I’ve had my own. I’ve overcome several different types of addictions; struggled with emotional eating, hit rock bottoms.

Here is what we have in common… we have a story. You have yours, I have mine.

I learned that I can change my story and it changed my body and my life.

I learned that I needed a little courage and resilience and to be aware when things were really chaotic.

You can do this too. Anyone can.

I believe sustaining weight loss begins with 3 factors, which I’ll share in a moment.

Then I’m going to share the 10 keys that I believe will make an immediate impact on sustaining weight loss. Note, I am saying “sustaining”.

Anyone can lose weight for a month or two, right?

I have a much higher expectation for you and the world: Long term health.

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The 3 C’s of sustaining weight loss.

Courage.

I like the term “radical”. It’s kind of gotten a bad wrap politically but I want to change that… What you want is radical change, right? You want a drastic difference and let’s be honest, that takes courage!

It also takes some courage to really look at what this next sentence means to you…

“Your weight is a reflection of something emotionally you are dealing with that you haven’t let go of yet”

The body’s suffering is a mask. It’s like our mind is in such pain that it needs to hold up this mask to hide what is really suffering. Our bodies are carrying weight to hide our pain.

It takes courage to look at the diversity of yourself as a person. To see all the parts of you and own them, whether you want to or not.

Community.

When we collaborate and contribute to others we gain the most love and I believe this is what also helps us to lose the weight. It’s really by serving others that we can see ourselves.

When you have a community, you are forced to show up with your heart. You are forced to open it up too (scary!). We are pretty good at keeping lots of walls around our hearts typically, aren’t we?

Community strengthens you and you need it to thrive in health. It forces you to open.

Commitment.

No one is going to lead your life but you and each moment is a choice that you make.

Stop looking backwards! Nothing worked or maybe something kind of did. Either way, it’s over, it’s done. Leave it behind. Be grateful for it and move on and learn NOW.

Learn differently and unlearn that old stuff if you have to.

You must be able to sit with yourself and on one-hand see where you are right now, why you are there and who you are. You must be able to see who you are with all the fears, realities and feelings.

You must be able to sit in that same space but in the other hand see the vision of where you are going and feel the desires for it, with a knowing that you will attain it and to see it clearly.

Your commitment is seeing these two different versions of YOU and bridging the gap between them.

You are committed to the outcome with an understanding that weight loss is a process not a goal. The gifts are in the process, NOT the end result.

Please take some time with the next 10 steps. Again, this is a process.

These steps will create long-term weight loss. Work the steps and dive deeply into each of them.

Hang these on the wall, the fridge, or the bathroom mirror.

10 Action Steps

Self-awareness practice.

If you’ve been following the blog, you’ll know how strongly I feel about the connection we have to our emotional health and nutrition + weight loss. I believe one of the most important steps is to cultivate a self awareness practice which includes: self care, self love, self compassion, self respect, self worth and much more.

Community.

In community we strengthen each other. Human beings need to be seen, heard, touched and loved to thrive. We will lose weight when we can attract a community of support and stretch. A sisterhood. A brotherhood. Even if it’s with only one other person to begin with.

Your team.

Sometimes we need some “tweaks” along the way to shift the body into fat burning mode or to remove the blocks that have been holding us back. Utilizing health coaches, life coaches, chiropractic, holistic or naturopathic practitioners, doctors, acupuncture, reiki, massage, sauna’s, tapping and more can be catalysts in your journey at different points in time.

Feminine weight loss (for men too!) READ THIS.

The yin and the yang. We all have both feminine and masculine within us, that is how we are made. If you are trying to lose weight then you must begin by tapping into your feminine spirit (this has nothing to do with being a woman by the way). This feminine spirit is the evolution of your human self that is open and receiving of love. This means letting go of driving and controlling and instead opening the doorway for you to truly connect with your body. It’s time to create a true intimacy with your body.

Hormone healing.

There are hormonal imbalances that hold us back from losing weight. They involve insulin, cortisol, leptin and thyroid hormone and sometimes genetic cases. This can be assessed by working with your practitioner but you can begin to heal your hormone’s naturally and I can show you how. Please avoid unhealthy fats like peanut oil, vegetable oil, canola oil, soybean oil, margarine, hydrogenated oils and low quality meats. Instead focus on healthy fats regularly and first thing in the morning. Choose from olive oil, real and raw butter, fish oils, coconut oil or ghee. Eat more fish, grassfed meat (if needed) and chia seeds. This is a start.

Resistance.

There is something very real called weight loss resistance and it can be very frustrating, often depressing. It happens when men or women have an imbalance that makes losing weight super tough even after doing everything deemed as “right”.

This is where gut healing comes into play. We know that when we eat less calories or work out, we’ll lose weight and while this is true and we have the science to back it up, the reality for many is that counting calories, eating right and working out doesn’t work. Why?

One reason is that there is some gut healing to be done. Our guts have a healthy bacteria/intestinal flora and this helps us lose weight. It is not the only option, but unless your gut is healed you won’t be able to move forward.

Another reason is likely hormones (see above). I’m sure there are a few more that have yet to be discovered by scientists too…

Eliminate sugars.

Your body is trained by you. You have either trained it to burn fat or to burn sugar. It can be untrained thought. If you are in a sugar burning mode you will store fat. The more sugar that you have in your body, the more toxic you will be. Sugar feeds obesity, cancer, heart disease, diabetes and many others. You must cut it all out to begin. Use the winning the sugar game program to help you get started.

Movement.

If you aren’t moving you are dying. We are all dying. Pretty harsh reality, but you must be reminded that the vessel you have as your body is your home and unless you move it daily, it will not last as long. You can “wish you would have” done more when you are 70 and missing out on your family or you can do something about it now and guarantee time with that family. Be committed to move you’re a$$ everyday. It’s the best investment you can make in you.

Detoxify and release toxins.

Toxins make you fat and your body is likely filled with them. This subject is not fun because no one wants to think of the sea of toxins we live in and that live in us, right? However, unless you look at the reality of your bathtub cleaner, facial lotion, deodorant, tooth paste, the chemicals on your fruits and veggies and within your packaged foods, you will fight a losing battle with weight and health. Your skin is your biggest organ. Do you know what you are putting on it and exposing it to? This is a drastic lifestyle shift and it is necessary for long-term weight loss and health. Take steps today to detoxify your cells.

Richly nourished.

One of the reasons we don’t lose weight also comes from the fact that we are lacking the nutrients, minerals and vitamins that we need so desperately to keep our bodies in balance. Your body is craving foods with colors, diversity and excitement. It is craving more veggies, seeds, nuts and occasional fruits. Most of the time, what you put in is probably more important that what you take out.

I used each of these 10 steps to completely change and heal my life. I happily work them every single day still and not only are they the backbone to the Love Yourself Naked® programs I offer, but also I believe they are the backbone to sustaining weight loss and long term health.

I see you.

You are loved.

You ARE love.

You are beautiful.

You are a spiritual being.

Change your story.

You can do anything.

You are everything.

With commitment to your love yourself naked journey,

Renee

xo

PS. I love hearing from you. What are your thoughts on sustaining weight loss? Which of the 10 steps do you feel like you need to focus on most right now? Leave a comment below, I always respond myself.

January 31 2013

I’ll have what she’s having – 3 tips to getting what you want

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Last week.

This last week, I spoke to millions of people via a Fox News segment and also hundreds of people about Winning Sugar at local Better Health Markets near my home. Thank you for joining me on this blog if you’ve been following from the beginning or you are joining in now. I’m honored to be with you.

The sugar program info is here.

That’s me to the left, out with a friend, laughing so hard it hurt and dining on some awesome Middle Eastern cuisine. I was also over tired and in bed an hour after that photo.

One of my most profound moments last week was the woman who came up to me crying after I spoke. She shared with me that she “finally got it, that she knows this is hard, but she knows what to do now and she will do it anyway.” She thanked me a lot and we hugged.

The other moment that stuck out was shooting a pretend laser with my 3-year-old son, crashing to the floor over and over in deep full on impact playtime and laughter that left me crying and my legs bruised at the end. Rewarding and awesome.

The lesson: deep human connection.

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I’ve been asked A LOT… “Renee, what do you eat? What is your lifestyle like?”

Today, I want to share with you some things that I do every day that contribute to my health and then in a future blog I will share the 3 C’s to sustainable weight loss and sugar addiction because what you are about to read is like the appetizer to that main course.

Sometimes weight loss goals, personal health goals, letting go of sugar addiction, healing your relationship with your partner, having lots of cash and keeping it, the career you desire most… these goals feel so high up on the mountain. Having reached the summit, we feel this ecstasy only to be let down when we realize we aren’t living the fantasy.

And yet…

What holds us back?

I believe the root of what hold’s us back is the deep connection we don’t often have with humans, in particular – yourself. The connection you have with YOU.

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A story.

It wasn’t long ago where I was sitting in the doctor’s office where I see some of the physician’s patients each week. I was there as a practitioner but half way through I thought I needed to be the patient.

Prior to the session, I did my meditation and prayer for the person I was about to see. We’ll call her “Gloria” for the sake of the story. My goal is to be present and show up fully for that person and this ritual helps me. While I’m listening, I’m looking for a miracle to occur for that person, which is really a shift in perception. I am speaking only when guided to. This requires me to “hold a space” for that person that has good energy, that is free of my internal crap and thoughts and it feels safe for them to be free and vulnerable.

As Gloria spoke to me, I began having a profound pain in my chest. It really hurt and it was a stabbing feeling. I grabbed the table and squeezed tightly to try to hide it. I began thinking about what this could be and needing it to go away so I could listen to her fully. The pain only got worse. I was feeling grateful to be in a doctor’s office wondering if I might need to walk down the hall to be checked out…

I remember saying in my mind that this hour wasn’t about me and to let this go and to be present for Gloria…. To listen and snap out of it. I had a moment of getting down on myself and feeling selfish that my feelings were taking over when I wanted to be there for her. I needed to let Gloria see she was capable in the issue she was sharing, even though she couldn’t see it for herself and I was having a hard time focusing on her.

I took a few deep breaths with my hand on my heart, as Gloria spoke.

It was in that moment that I realized I needed to ask Gloria about HER chest. This idea seemed strange so I pushed away the thought at first. Gloria kept talking. I kept partially listening and hurting.

Then I asked her…. “How is your chest feeling these days?”

Gloria said, “funny you should ask that!” She began to explain that she’s been struggling with intense chest pains all week. Stronger than heartburn and quite painful. Gloria shared that it was unbearable this morning and it was hurting her right now.

Fast forward to 15 minutes later. She ended up sharing an extremely painful and fearful childhood memory and how her father and mother responded to the situation with her after it was over. Gloria began to sob. She was healing.

I believe this childhood story and the pain of her parents was weighing on her heart and her chest. I also believe it was keeping “weight on her body too”. I did recommend some “gut” healing to help her digestion, some healthy fats too… however I knew that her sobbing and sharing that story eased up most of what was weighing on her.

The Lesson: How to tell the difference between your feelings and someone else’s feelings.

I am still learning at this but getting better and better. I have a belief that many of us feel other people’s “stuff” and we end up carrying it around as our own “baggage” because we cannot tell the difference.

By the way, yes, my chest pain went away very quickly after that.

Even if you have a hard time believing that story or understanding it, I invite you to keep an open mind to it and here is why…

This concept is a Very Important factor in weight loss that not many people talk about. I’ll be sharing more about it on next week’s blog.

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Truth.

The truth set me free. I was not living in my truth for years. In other words, I was feeling like a victim rather than taking care of myself. I was blaming versus accepting. I was controlling instead of trusting.

I had forgotten who I was.

We have a choice about the thoughts we think. Our thoughts don’t just happen to us, we allow them to happen and we can change our thoughts.

Take Action: Are you aware of your thoughts? How can you listen today to the conversation you have with yourself?

When we do, we will begin to change our beliefs. However, in order to change our thoughts we must allow ourselves to actually feel them!

Feeling.

No one wants to talk about feelings. We avoid them. We think it’s too vulnerable of a place to be in. Sometimes feeling “stuff” makes us feel too ‘feminine’ (whether you are a man or woman), so we often NUMB those feelings assuming feeling anything or accessing our femininity is a sign of weakness. It’s not.

Take Action: Journal them out.

(I often ask people initially to journal what they eat and how they feel after each meal, I highly recommend this)

You know what happens though when they get to the writing about “feelings” part?

They get irritated because they don’t see the point in simply writing “I feel fine”, “I feel good”, “I don’t feel anything”

Here lies the problem (and the gift). You have forgotten how to feel. You have forgotten how to creatively express your innermost emotions.

Somewhere along the way, many of us began associating our feelings with stuff like sugar, food, work, alcohol, drugs, ‘special’ or unhealthy relationships. Instead of “feeling”, it became easier to burry, hide and numb these feelings in the bowl of pop corn, Ben and Jerry’s, work project or dysfunctional relationship.

I get it all to well. I’ve been there!

If you want to heal your food stuff, weight stuff and relationships – you must learn to feel all of your “stuff”…. Whether you want to or not!!!

This is the essence of Love Yourself Naked…. Stripping down.

Speaking of stripping down…

Looking in the mirror.

I recall staring at myself in the mirror when I was a young little girl and an adult walked by me and told me to stop being so vain. That moment stuck with me for years and years! It defined who I was. I believed I was vain.

Now, this adult obviously didn’t know at the time what they were saying could hurt or that it could have been handled differently or even the impact it would have. The comment came from their own “stuff”.

We’ve all had the moments where some said something that has never left us. We might not consciously think of it each day, but it’s become part of our story and it creates conflict in our lives, weight gain, relationship issues, etc.

I’m pretty grateful for the comment now. It was a catalyst to creating this business that serves so many others.

What if… in that moment, that adult had come closer to my little girl self and said, “get closer to that mirror. Look deeply into your eyes. What do you see?”

There is a universal belief that our reflection is a vital part of our soul.

I believe that you must stare deeply into your eyes in a mirror. You must be able to really see yourself. You may cry, you may feel uncomfortable at first. You might think it’s stupid and pointless. You may see your shame and oh boy it’s tough to see it at first, but keep staring.

You need to be seen and it’s starts with a mirror and you. Once you’ve mastered that, we can talk more about “loving yourself naked” but not until you can see your true self in your own eyes with awareness and solitude.

Take Action: practice in the mirror today

I love the Buddhist koan that asks, “what does your original face look like?”

With deep commitment to your love yourself naked journey,

Renee

P.S. Looking forward to sharing on next weeks blog, The 3 C’s To Sustainable Weight Loss. Reminder that the Winning Sugar course closes this Sunday for a while since our cleanse opens soon.

Winning Sugar details.